


Archimedes

by Lady_Belles_lettres



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Based on the Archimedes item description, Birds, Doves, Gen, Murder, Origin Story, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 13:18:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14716797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Belles_lettres/pseuds/Lady_Belles_lettres
Summary: The Medic loves his pet bird, Archimedes, a lot. But have you ever wondered how they met each other?Read the origin story of how Archimedes went from being part of wedding dovery to become Medic's companion.





	Archimedes

**Author's Note:**

> This story was actually written for a challenge in the Team Fortress 2 Amino, but why not I post it here too?
> 
> The story is based on the Archimedes item description: https://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/Archimedes  
> I know that the item description says that Archimedes was at the Prime Minister's wedding, but if we assume that the wedding was in Germany, Germany only has a Chancellor. Also, I doubt that Medic had been in any country other than Germany prior the events in the game.
> 
> It should also be noted that the settings take place during the late 50's to early 60's, so I apologise if there are any inaccuracies in the story.

The church was a lot livelier than usual that day. Wedding bells were ringing loudly for Germany’s Chancellor and his new wife.

          The dove was contentedly perched on top of one of the benches in the church hall. Usually, the humans would shoo him away and he would have a hard time trying to explain that he was part of the wedding dovery since many of them couldn’t understand him. To humans, birds were considered a nuisance at weddings. However, the young boy sitting on the bench didn’t seem to mind his company. In fact, the boy even stroked the dove’s head once in a while, which the dove found it pleasing.

          The dove tilted his head as he watched the two newlyweds walk down the aisle towards the main entrance. His feathers ruffled in shock as he realised something. They were heading outside!

          The dove looked around the hall wildly. He could see that some of his colleagues slacking around, not aware that the Chancellor and his wife were nearing the entrance.

          The dove made a loud cooing noise which annoyed some of the wedding guests but, at least, alerted his colleagues to gather behind the newlyweds.

          The dove and his colleagues were well-known for their impeccable wedding dovery service, which was why the Chancellor himself hired them. They have always done their job perfectly and the dove didn’t want to screw up this time, especially when he heard that the Chancellor would turn them into pigeon pie if things didn’t go as planned.

          After the other doves were in position, the dove proceeded to fly behind the Chancellor’s wife. The dove could sense that the wife was feeling uncomfortable with all of the birds flying around her. There were a few times where he flew too close to her and she would swat him away. Of course, the dove was used to this sort of behaviour when accompanying the bride and groom.

          They were almost at the main entrance. The dove tweeted to the other doves to get ready and they nodded their heads in response.

          As the Chancellor and his wife stepped out of the church, the dove and his colleagues soared out into the sky, surrounding the couple. The dove could hear gasps from the crowd outside, followed by clapping.

          His job was done here. The dove felt relieved that he wouldn’t be cooked into pie.

          Before the wedding, the Chancellor had promised the whole lot of them the best grain in Germany. The dove’s colleagues were, of course, ecstatic to hear this. Now that they have succeeded in their task, the Chancellor had to keep his promise.

          Despite the magnificent reward, the dove didn’t feel as excited as his colleagues. In fact, he didn’t feel that the reward was all that great, considering that it was the Chancellor that they were serving for. He knew that he should have been grateful that he was rewarded with all sorts of delicious food by being part of the wedding dovery, but for some reason, he felt like he was missing something.

          Flying above the crowd, he saw a few news reporters taking pictures of the Chancellor and his wife. He reckoned that one of them had taken a photo of the beautiful pattern of doves surrounding the couple just now and will publish it on newspapers. The Chancellor would be pleased.

          The dove was starting to get tired of flapping his wings, so, he flew down to the crowd and perched on the shoulder of a man wearing a doctor’s coat. He knew that it was risky to approach humans, especially when they were in large groups like this, but the dove didn't have any more energy to fly.

          The dove expected a disgusted glance from the man, but to his surprise, just like the boy in the church, the man smiled at him. The man raised a gloved hand and offered the dove to perch on his finger. The dove felt a bit sceptical but jumped onto his finger anyway.

          “Why, hello there!” said the man cheerfully. “Aren’t you a charming little creature?”

           The man patted the dove’s head lightly. The dove cooed in delight. He was starting to like this man. He was one of the few humans that the dove seemed to be able to trust, and it was amazing as he had just encountered the man.

          The man then put a finger to his lips as if telling the dove to be quiet. “Don't make any sound, my friend," he said. “I’ve got an important mission here!”

          The dove didn’t care what the man wanted to do but kept quiet anyway so he didn’t become a hindrance to him. He proceeded to perch onto the man’s shoulder again.

          The man’s glasses glinted menacingly in the sunlight as he quietly snuck away from the crowd. The dove thought that it wouldn’t matter if they accidentally made noises because the others probably wouldn’t hear them as the clapping and the chattering of the crowd was much louder. The dove noticed that the man was heading towards a van. He tilted his head with curiosity.

          The man glanced at the dove. As if he could read the dove’s thoughts, he said, “Ah, you’re inquisitive about this, I see.”

          The man giggled like an excited boy, but if you listened carefully, you could hear a tint of wickedness in it. “You see that catering van over there?” he said. “I’m going to steal it.”

           The dove perked up when he heard ‘catering van’. Ever since his first day of working for wedding dovery, he found out that humans use catering vans to bring food to weddings. That catering van must have a lot of food in it!

          The dove cooed happily. It would be a lot better than the grains that the Chancellor will reward to him later.

          The man continued to the van. The dove couldn’t help but notice something shiny inside his coat. He tried to burrow into the man’s coat to find out the shiny object, but the man put him back on his shoulder.

          “You are a feisty one!” exclaimed the man. “Get ready, we’re here already.”

          They had reached the back of the catering van. The dove felt himself becoming more excited. The man turned the doorknob and opened the door. The dove was surprised with what he saw.

          “Oh, yeah, this is what I’m talking about!” exclaimed the man. In the boot of the van, there were huge glass mugs filled with strange reddish liquid in them. The man rubbed his hands excitedly. “This is what I call OKTOBERFEST!”

          The dove could hear another person yell in shock not far ahead. The man jerked in surprise and rubbed his head sheepishly.

          “Whoops.”

          The dove could hear footsteps getting louder from behind until it finally stopped. The man and the dove turned around and saw another man in white uniform with his arms crossed. He looked _really_ angry.

          They were in trouble now.

          “Hey!” exclaimed the uniform guy. “You shouldn’t be here!”

          The man adjusted his glasses and put his hand into his coat. “Oh,” he said. He took out a long metallic object with jagged edges. “Is that so?”

          The dove finally saw the object that was inside his coat – a bonesaw. Before the uniform guy could even react, the man swiftly stabbed the bonesaw through the uniform guy’s chest. Blood splattered onto the man’s white coat and the dove’s white feathers.

          “Hah!” exclaimed the man, seemingly unfazed with the murder he just made. “I don’t think so!”

          The man pulled the bonesaw out of the uniform guy’s corpse and dusted his coat. “Phew,” he said. The bloodstains were beginning to dry on his coat due to the hot weather. “What a bloodbath!”

          The dove was becoming impatient. Without waiting for the man, he flew off his shoulder and dived into one of the mugs. The liquid in the mug cleaned off the blood from his feathers. The dove had no idea what the liquid was, but at least, it cooled him off.

          The man chuckled from behind. “You remind me of the great Greek scientist, Archimedes, when he leapt into the bath!” he said as he lifted the dove from the mug. The dove shook the liquid off his feathers.

          “Hm... Archimedes.” said the man. “That’s a nice name! Do you like it, bird? What if I name you Archimedes?”

          The dove have never thought of giving himself a name before, but he didn’t mind if the man wanted to give him one. He also wasn’t sure of whoever this Archimedes was, but it had a nice ring to it. He flapped his wings in approval.

          “Well, Archimedes it is.” said the man. “You’re a special little bird, Archimedes. How about you come with me?”

          Follow the man? Did the man actually want the dove to follow him? The dove was lost in thoughts.

          He never had an owner before, it might be nice to have a human take care of him. The dove leapt onto the man’s shoulder, trying to tell that he was willing to follow.

          The man’s eyes brightened up. “Oh, Archimedes,” said the man, tears forming in the corner of his eyes. He took off his glasses and wiped off the tears and remaining blood on his sleeve before putting them back on. “I’ve never had my own pet before. It’ll be splendid to have a companion.”

          Archimedes rubbed his body on the man’s cheek affectionately, which caused the man to giggle. “We have a lot of things to do, but first...”

          The man picked up the liquid-filled mug. “Let’s have a toast.” he said. He held the mug up high. “OKTOBERFEST!”

          The man proceeded to take the car keys from the pocket of the now-rotting corpse of the uniform guy. “Let’s get out of here, Archimedes!”

**Author's Note:**

> Don't ask me what wedding dovery is, I have no idea either. Actually, I don't think that wedding dovery is even real! So, I just made up my own assumption about it.
> 
> If you notice, Medic lacks the German accent that is heard from the game in his dialogue here. This is because everything he and the other characters say are in German, considering that this was before he moved to America.


End file.
